Out Here

I am living outside it all.

If my various transgressions hadn't been enough to made me an outcast, my lack of breast milk was.

At least that is what He tells me.

I live under the sky now,  in the hedges and along the highways.

The air sometimes it caresses me, other times it whips and scorns.

Greens are plentiful, although slightly dusty.

Nuts fall, as if delivered by angels.

I have a knife with which I stalk small prey.  I am getting better at it!

 (Rat tastes very similar to tuna, I never knew that)

I wear spider webs as jewelry,  wildflowers in my tangled hair.

I wouldn't have done anything differently,  even if i did know the outcome beforehand!

Out here I am free of your bounds, I can make any choice that I choose.  No repercussions, what else can you do to me?  Only the birds can mock me now!

But, no, I lie.  Do you know it?   You see me,  still lurking around your edges, still sniffing for a whiff of  empathy.  Let me in, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!

But, silence;  only the air answers back.

****************************************

They're Poisoning The Squirrels, Again

Where do you go when you dream?
                          
Or:        
















                                                

You're lying in corpse pose, where are you now?

Or:

You're lying on a bed of moss, deep within the forest.






Your mind;  ranging, far off, wandering.

Your body;  still, relaxed, gurgling.

And now the breathing:

in and out, as easy as it was___ years ago when you were just a ____

no thinking no planning, it just is.

So are you flying?

 Conversing with Gods? 

Telling the Truth?

I speak in symbols to you - read my meanings in between the words.

*************************************

They Drugged Her

When she wasn't wandering around the town, she was standing in that one place outside the saloon, warm urine running down her legs.
I'm old too now you know!

It wasn't always this way! Lord.
Yes, her parents died and she was young and on her own, what was she supposed to do?

But it was that boyfriend, he kept giving her them drugs.  And she liked em!
I don't know, maybe if they hadn't a drugged her, she might've taken an interest in life and tried to pull herself out of her miserable condition and make something of her life!

 It was them drugs!
Used to be known for her multiplication skills, she did math tricks and such for drinks! it was a hoot.
Now look at her.

I talked to her once, yes.
We passed in the thorough fare and she dropped her handkerchief that had been tucked into her skirt or someplace.  I picked it up, said Ma'am? and she turned.  Looked me square in the eye, said Thank you.
Thank YOU.
What color?
Hmm     Green?
PIERCIN' gaze, felt it seared my brain.

She seemed to  age fast all of sudden,  I guess we all did.   But i can remember when she....
you know....
 I'm old too now, you know!